From Jay Leno on The Tonight Show:

Congress says this week that they are looking into the Bernie Madoff scandal.

So the guy that made $50 billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $750 billion disappear.

That should work out well!  NOT!

From Jay Leno on the Tonight Show:

Happy birthday to convicted senator of Alaska, Ted Stevens, who turned 85 today.  Turns out he didn’t get any gifts.  Or, at least he didn’t report any…